> STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS: > > BOY: May I hold your hand? > GIRL: No thanks, it isn’t heavy. > > GIRL: Say you love me! Say you love me! > BOY: You love me… > > GIRL: If we become engaged will you give me a ring? ? > BOY: Sure, what’s your phone number? ? > > GIRL: I think the poorest people are the happiest. > BOY: Then marry me and we ” ll be the happiest couple > > GIRL: Darling, I want to dance like this forever. > BOY: Don’t you ever want to improve? ? > > BOY: I love you and I could die for you! > GIRL: How soon? ? > > BOY: I would go to the end of the world for you! > GIRL: Yes, but would you stay there? ? > > SHARON: Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning > kiss? ? > TRACY: I did once. He’d forgotten to take the > cigarette out of his mouth.
> > MAN: You remind me of the sea. > WOMAN: Because I’m wild, romantic and exciting? > MAN: NO, because you make me sick. > > WIFE: You tell a man something, it goes in one ear > and comes out of the other. > HUSBAND: You tell a woman something: It goes in both > ears and comes out of the mouth. > > MARY: John says I’m pretty.
Andy says I’m ugly. What > do u think, Peter? > PETER: A bit of both. I think you ” re pretty ugly. > > 1) Girlfriend: .”.. And are you sure you love me and > no one else?” > Boyfriend: “Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again > yesterday.” > > 2) Teacher: “Which is more important to us, the sun > or the moon?” > Pupil: “The moon.” > Teacher: “Why?” > Pupil: “The moon gives us light at night when we need > it but the sun gives us light only in the day time > when we don’t need it.” > > > 3) Teacher: “What do you call a person who keeps on > talking when people are no longer interested?” > Pupil: “A teacher.” > > 4) Waiter: “Would you like your coffee black?” > Customer: “What other colors do you have?” > > 5) My father is so old that when he was in school, > history was called current affairs. > > > 6) Teacher: “Sam, you talk a lot!” > Sam: “It’s a family tradition.” > Teacher: “What do you mean?” > Sam: “Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father > is a teacher.” > Teacher: “What about your mother?” Sam: “She’s a > woman.” > > 7) Tom: “How should I convey the news to my father > that I’ve failed?” > David: “You just send a telegram: Result declared, > past year’s performance repeated.” > > 8) Teacher: “Now, children, if I saw a man beating a > donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be > showing?” > Student: “Brotherly love.” > > 9) Teacher: “Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say > prayers before eating?” > Sam: “No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good > cook.” > > 10) Patient: “What are the chances of my recovering > doctor?” > Doctor: “One hundred percent.
Medical reco rds show > that nine out of ten people die of the disease you > have. Yours is the tenth case I’ve treated. The others > all died.” > > 11) Teacher: ” Can anybody give an example of > COINCIDENCE?” > One Student: “Sir, my Mother and Father got married > on the same day and at the same time.” > > 12) Teacher: ” George Washington not only chopped > down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing > it. > Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” > One Student: ” Because George still had the axe in is > hand.” > > > FORWARD TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW! ! ! = ) > STUPID QUESTIONS WITH THE SMART ANSWERS: > > BOY: May I hold your hand? > GIRL: No thanks, it isn’t heavy. > > GIRL: Say you love me! Say you love me! > BOY: You love me… > > GIRL: If we become engaged will you give me a ring? ? > BOY: Sure, what’s your phone number? ? > > GIRL: I think the poorest people are the happiest.
> BOY: Then marry me and we ” ll be the happiest couple > > GIRL: Darling, I want to dance like this forever. > BOY: Don’t you ever want to improve? ? > > BOY: I love you and I could die for you! > GIRL: How soon? ? > > BOY: I would go to the end of the world for you! > GIRL: Yes, but would you stay there? ? > > SHARON: Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning > kiss? ? > TRACY: I did once. He’d forgotten to take the > cigarette out of his mouth. > > MAN: You remind me of the sea.
> WOMAN: Because I’m wild, romantic and exciting? > MAN: NO, because you make me sick. > > WIFE: You tell a man something, it goes in one ear > and comes out of the other. > HUSBAND: You tell a woman something: It goes in both > ears and comes out of the mouth. > > MARY: John says I’m pretty.
Andy says I’m ugly. What > do u think, Peter? > PETER: A bit of both. I think you ” re pretty ugly. > > 1) Girlfriend: .”.. And are you sure you love me and > no one else?” > Boyfriend: “Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again > yesterday.” > > 2) Teacher: “Which is more important to us, the sun > or the moon?” > Pupil: “The moon.” > Teacher: “Why?” > Pupil: “The moon gives us light at night when we need > it but the sun gives us light only in the day time > when we don’t need it.” > > > 3) Teacher: “What do you call a person who keeps on > talking when people are no longer interested?” > Pupil: “A teacher.” > > 4) Waiter: “Would you like your coffee black?” > Customer: “What other colors do you have?” > > 5) My father is so old that when he was in school, > history was called current affairs. > > > 6) Teacher: “Sam, you talk a lot!” > Sam: “It’s a family tradition.” > Teacher: “What do you mean?” > Sam: “Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father > is a teacher.” > Teacher: “What about your mother?” Sam: “She’s a > woman.” > > 7) Tom: “How should I convey the news to my father > that I’ve failed?” > David: “You just send a telegram: Result declared, > past year’s performance repeated.” > > 8) Teacher: “Now, children, if I saw a man beating a > donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be > showing?” > Student: “Brotherly love.” > > 9) Teacher: “Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say > prayers before eating?” > Sam: “No sir, I don’t have to, my mom is a good > cook.” > > 10) Patient: “What are the chances of my recovering > doctor?” > Doctor: “One hundred percent.
Medical reco rds show > that nine out of ten people die of the disease you > have. Yours is the tenth case I’ve treated. The others > all died.” > > 11) Teacher: ” Can anybody give an example of > COINCIDENCE?” > One Student: “Sir, my Mother and Father got married > on the same day and at the same time.” > > 12) Teacher: ” George Washington not only chopped > down his father’s Cherry tree, but also admitted doing > it. > Now do you know why his father didn’t punish him?” > One Student: ” Because George still had the axe in is > hand.” > > > FORWARD TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW! ! ! = ).